Author: Mrs Wilson of Oz

Our Sunday started so well. No major celebrities had passed away over night, (always puts a downer on my morning), Monty had only kicked me in the neck once, and the sun was shining. I knew deep down, today was going to be a good day.

At 8am, Tim found three rotten bananas in the fruit bowl and decided he was going to be all “super-dad’. He asked Monty to help him make some banana bread, however it wasn’t until the recipe told them to add butter that he realised we didn’t have any! I suggested extra virgin olive oil and he winced, so I directed him to the coconut oil. Much to my amazement he managed to get the quantity right and the banana bread was delish! Another proper parenting “whoop” and high five while the children devoured it.

I suggested we head off to Blaxland Park which is about 35 minutes drive from us, and according to Google was the most awesome park in Sydney! We did so well, we got everyone showered, teeth brushed; I know, right now you’re thinking S**T she got the kids washed and brushed their teeth!!? Yes I did, and all in under an hour and a half! *High five to me!

We shoved a couple of water bottles and some more rotten fruit into the backpack and headed out the door. Once Tim had forced Monty into his car seat, (knee in the chest job) we drove off with “The Very Hungry Caterpillar” being read to us by Eric Carle on volume 43, with shouts of “I CAAAAANT HEAR IT”. Oh good grief, what did I say about “a good day?”

Tim had put the wrong address in to the Sat Nav, (ok ok maybe you hadn’t), so 15 minutes into the journey we were on the verge of divorce. “Why do you speak to me like I’m four?” “I wasn’t, you were talking to me like I was 4!”. You know the one!! The children were sat in the back looking at us in role reversal. I was expecting one of them to tell us to “simmer down” at any minute.

Once the route was properly established (I cleverly put in the correct address), and divorce was off the cards, we changed the CD and all happily sang along to “tie me kangaroo down sport” and “my boomerang wont come back”…. When in Oz!!

Blaxland park is strategically placed adjacent to the prison. This worked in our favour. As we drove up, we pointed out the high fences, barbed wire and security cameras, told the children what sort of naughty buggers were in there, and warned them that’s where they’d be if they misbehaved in the park.. Jesus, they stuck by us like sardines…. Until they saw the splash zone, then all hell broke loose.

There were socks flying in all directions, undies being shoved in my back pocket, the rucksack was nearly torn to shreds as they looked for their cozzies. I was trying my hardest to slap sun-cream on them before they legged it, which meant they weren’t only sun safe, they also looked like grass monsters. Monty even had some rubbish and a little possum dropping stuck to his leg from when he’d tried to escape my slippery grip.

*Super Parenting Tip: Always do sunscreen while naked before leaving the house. (FYI you don’t need to be naked to apply someones sunscreen).

The park was rammed. Kids flying all over the place. Some laughing, a few crying,  quite a lot more looking completely terrified as they had blatantly lost their parents.

Blaxland is a huge park, with slides, swings, hiding places and lots of tunnels going through grass mounds. It’s very much like the place the Teletubbies live, but thankfully no Tinkywinky, Dipsy, Lala or Po! This chaotic landscape means that as soon as one of your children decides to leg it, you really need to think on your feet. “Who is my favourite?”

I usually go with whoever has been best behaved on that particular day. So today, it was looking good for Poppy! Monty has a habit of seeing something cool and going all zombie on us. Today was no exception, although when he went all zombie and headed out of the splash zone, a massive kid wiped him out and gave him a nose bleed. Phew, thanks buddy! It was a blessing in disguise. It saved me twenty minutes of heart palpitations, and excessively sweaty palms.

After a good four hours of playing, whooping and legging it into the distance to give mummy a heart attack, the children were lured back to the car with the promise of stopping for a treat on the way home! We were all hot, pink as prawns, and worn out. I had absolutely nothing planned for dinner, a “holiday fridge” (clean and empty), and it was getting dark.  My inner *super parent* took over and I veered into the corner shop car park, hopped out and hunter gathered for my little ones. Two frozen pizzas and a tub of maltezers later and we were set for the night!

The house was chilly when we got in. Not sure why we now find 20 degrees chilly but I can assure you we do. We closed the shutters, put a movie on, and settled in for the night.  Tim poured the red wine, the pizzas were crisping up nicely, and the children were becoming square eyed in front of the TV. I looked round, and thought wow, we are such lucky folk. A roof over our head,  food in the oven, what more do we need!? Maybe to work on our table manners, but hey, we’ve got plenty of time for that! TV dinner at the ready!! *High five!

Pretty perfect bank holiday Monday all in all!

Keep your eyes peeled for the next blog! Wish us luck!

We went to the driving range this morning even though it howling a gale and really chilly. It was that awful drizzly rain where you think you wont get too wet so you don’t put a coat on, but end up going home looking like a well dunked tea bag with a 70’s afro! Lush.

Monty has his own golf club, he loves the driving range and is actually pretty good at whacking a golf ball. He’s pretty good at whacking most things to be fair. His sister, me, his dad, anyone or thing within reach when he is doing his moves, but mainly his sister!

We’re doing that typical parent thing where we make excuses for his wild behaviour. “oh we think he’s going to be a natural when he starts Karate”, “I think its important that he  can stick up for himself” and “he’s very good at tackling, maybe he’ll be a famous rubgy player”. The bottom line is, he is happiest when he is breaking wind, burping or kicking the living daylights out of  someone. This is fine until we have elderly visitors, or we need to go to the library, or sit on an 8 hour flight! Oh gosh, dreadful library memories flooding back.. Rose was not a happy librarian.

Golf was pretty relaxed, we had 100 balls and once they were gone, we were out of there. Its actually a pretty good “family activity” to kill an hour or so. We were all separated by  small walls (yippedeee doo da). The children were too far apart to be able to wipe bogies on each other, and we told them it was a no talking area, so apart from the odd shriek of joy when the ball went further than the end of the mat it was peaceful…. Try it… you’ll thank me I promise. Of course this counts as a “super parent” activity and is definitely worth bringing up in conversation at toddler group when Fanny is talking about taking Delilah to baby yoga.

After golf, we tried to get a few jobs done for our holiday, just the usual last minute things. Buying currency, forking out tonnes of cash on new swimwear for the kids, the essential pharmacy trip because you just know I’m going to end up with some kind of crazy Malaysian diarrhea. These are the sorts of jobs we know we should be doing as a sole parent while the other stays at home watching Paw Patrol with the brats, but as ever, we went in eyes wide open, with two tired, hungry children, who were demanding we go straight to Toys R us. Oh good god! Here goes nothing!

The sliding doors part, people everywhere, children screaming, fathers weeping outside David Jones while mothers relax having full makeovers at the MAC counter, spotty teenage couples draped all over each other looking all loved up, oblivious to what lies in store for them in a few years.

Monty decided to hopscotch round Westfield, screeching if anyone dared step on a “blaaaaack LIIIIINE”. Poppy, as always, walked forwards while looking backwards, and therefore spent most of this joyful experience tripping over, stubbing her toes, or crashing into people, then bursting into tears because “it WAAAAASSSN’T MYYYYY FAUULT”.

A few parents look at us with that “oh we feel your pain” look, and then there’s the others…. The kids all in white, (who the heck lets their kids wear white?) hair beautifully tied back, whispering sweet nothings into each others ears, usually stroking some sort of cuddly kitten toy… Oh you know the ones. The children are  usually called Tarquin and Sapphire. They glare, they gasp, they even mutter about us under their breath! I try to ignore their stress free shopping trip and closely tail the family with the two overweight kids downing energy drinks. They are bound to go nuts in a minute.

We made it! We got our jobs done and we managed to get out of the shopping centre fairly unscathed. Although I have developed a slight twitchy eye. Go figure. We’ve now been at home for an hour or so, the weather is still awful, so we’ve donned our trackies and warm socks. Sydney is not dissimilar to Skegness this afternoon. So much for the endless sunshine Tim promised me.

We flicked through the movies and insisted the children watch ET as its a classic and something they just have to see. This caused huge trauma as they had their hearts set on some weird Christmas Shrek movie. We stood our ground, I smiled across the living room to Tim as he asserted himself, so proud and in love with this hunk of a father before me! “We can do this,” I said in my head, as the children hid behind cushions, weeping because they were scared.We werent going to break. ET is awesome and we had it on…

ET had just about got off the space ship and into the woods and the bloody internet went off and Netflix was no more. Damn it, we were back to bloomin Peppa pig. The children crossed their legs, glanced at each other and I am damn sure I saw a smirk. Bugger it…..

Tomorrows activities include watching ET and possibly a trip to buy some white clothes and a stuffed kitten for the children. I WILL succeed in parenting well.

As I sit in bed, sipping coffee and flipping through Facebook, (the children are plonked in front of the TV SHOCK HORROR) I cant help but feel emotional that its one of the last mornings of the school holidays. Don’t get me wrong, the kids have really got on my nerves this week, arguing, bickering, wiping bogies on each other, you know, the usual stuff, but I really cherish these times, although I am sure I look like I am about to have a nervous breakdown. There’s no pressure to get dressed at the crack of dawn, no school gate politics, we are free to come and go as we please. I love my “holiday handbag” overflowing with extra toys, snotty tissues and squelchy bananas (non organic i may add). I love the long beach days, coming home all sandy and salty, utterly exhausted and wondering how on earth I am going to find the energy to make a nutritious, healthy family meal that we can all enjoy together! Is there such a thing?

There is so much pressure on parents these days that we kind of miss the fun when it comes to parenting. We are bombarded with “helpful advice”, when actually all our children really need is to be happy and feel loved . Does it really matter that I have allowed my babies to eat an non organic apple for their 10am snack and that it was a bit sandy? Does it really matter that they have watched Lego Friends on Netflix for two hours this morning while scoffing  jammy toast? No, it doesn’t! And no I don’t feel guilty! At the end of the day, mothers and fathers need to be told they are doing a good job, rather than made to feel shameful that they served up fish fingers, chips and beans for dinner last night! I mean “who on earth would serve that?”

The truth of the matter is, we all have a pile of laundry sat waiting for someone to organise, we’ve all rushed our kids homework at the breakfast table at least once, and we’ve all given our kids a cup cake for dinner because the salmon fillet was “ugh disgusting mum”. This doesn’t mean we are failures, this doesn’t mean we need helpful advice on nutrition or to be told how important year 3 homework is, we just need a pat on the back and maybe a snap chat of some other mum who is covered in nutella (kitchen staple) and crying into her cold porridge.

No matter how “Facebook perfect” peoples lives look, we’re all in the same boat! We’re all being watched when our children are freaking out in the supermarket and all you can do is ram sweets down their throats to keep the peace, or when your darling son tells an old lady he’s going to “kick her in the butt”. Oh yes, we’re all in the same crazy boat full of nutters, and the last thing we need is “miss snooty pants telling us how “easy” it is to live as she does. Wearing her hand knitted outfits and eating her home baked pastries with her adorable little children enjoying an afternoon of craft! Look, no one ‘likes’ doing craft at home, that’s what toddler groups are for! No one in their right mind enjoys having PVA glue and cotton wool stuck all over their dining room table! I let my children paint….outside, I let them use glitter…. at other peoples houses, and I let them bake….when I am feeling especially patient! No I am not a fun sponge, I’d just rather not have even more chaos, when a scooter ride or a game of hide and seek in the garden gives just as much, if not more, pleasure! I am sure someone somewhere will be thinking “oh but without an hour of craft a day your hampering your child’s development, and they will never be able to create an award winning presentation at Google HQ”. Bite me!

The internet is full of advice on everything from breast feeding to making the perfect kids party, and we’re lucky to have this to hand, but I cant help but wonder what ever happened to asking your mum for advice, or turning to your friends? I am guilty of asking questions on online forums and then feeling like an awful, evil human being when someone tells me they are shocked that I would even put my son on a booster seat, and proceed to tag me in some hideous video of a child being propelled out of the windscreen and across a motorway, to prove their point! Shoot me now! I am not a perfect mother! I am no where near perfect! My children are not perfect, god damn it, no one is perfect, but we have a wonderful life, we have fun, we bicker and we adore each other, warts and all!

So my mission for the next 12 months is to completely ignore all the pop up bits of “parenting advice”; all the cookbooks teaching us how to make a sodding caterpillar out of shepherds pie, and how to “resolve a tantrum without giving in”! ( I mean who does that?) I am going to wing it! I am going to wing the next twelve months! If my children want to sleep in my bed, so be it! If they want to go to the shops in their underwear and slippers I may join them! We will be going on adventures to far flung places, we will be trying new types food, we will be playing, we will be hugging, we will be laughing, we will be doing chores, we will be comforting each other, we will be swimming, we will be doing homework, we will be cooking supper, and we will probably be doing craft at some point!   Not because I am the worlds best mum, or because I want the yummy mummy’s approval, but because I am a mum, and that’s just what mums do!!! (And dads for that matter!)

Oh my goodness! Nearly four months of visitors, and what a crazy four months it was! We are so lucky to have such wonderful friends and family , who are willing to travel all this way to see us and share our adventure! It definitely made our summer the best summer ever! (Poppy’s words not Mine but I totally agree). 

   
I remember people saying ” once you’ve done a summer in Australia, there’s no going back!”. Oh yes I understand now!  Summer is officially over, and I’m eagerly awaiting the next!  The temperature has dropped slightly, and the evenings are dark! Shocker! 

We had endless sunshine! We ate every meal outside, swam in the pool every day, ate ice creams, got through about 8 bottles of sun cream, and thanked our lucky stars that we had made the enormous leap to Oz!  There really is nothing quite like Christmas in the sun with your buddies! And we were so lucky that we had ours to share our prawns with!

In between games of  “cards against humanity”, BBQ’s and gin fuelled giggles, we managed to trek out West to the Parkes Elvis Festival! (www.parkeselvisfestival.com.au) What a treat!  There was not enough gasp in my body for the sights I was going to see! And that was just our husbands in Hawaiian shirts.

 As if being “out west” isn’t enough of an eye opener, everyone and their dog was dressed in some kind of Elvis outfit! Even the towns mayor was kitted out, in an open top Cadillac with an Elvis wig and the mayoral chain for good measure! “Elvis” was everywhere! Big ones, little ones, fat ones, thin ones, some incredibly talented ones, some not so much! 

The highlight had to be the Elvis show! Donny Edwards was “Elvis”. He had come all the way from Vegas, (vegas big shot) to this small country town, and the way the ladies screamed when he sang, you would have thought Elvis was alive and well in Parkes!  

 To be fair, he was pretty convincing! I’m (obviously) too young to have ever seen Elvis live, but the Parkes Social Club (exactly like an old British Legion) was alive with screaming Nanas, hollering grandmas, and excessively sweaty 50 somethings! They were clawing at the stage, queuing for a sweat soaked scarf, hundreds of which were being swept across Donnys face and draped round the necks of swooning  Ednas! 

Secretly I wanted to join them but was worried I might get stamped on in the rush! I did however accost the winning “Pricilla” and get a photo! I am convinced she had a welsh accent! And bloody lovely too!  

 
Once the fun had died down, we packed our very sweaty kids into the car, tired, emotional, and now  avid Elvis fans! We drove out a little bit further west to see “The Dish” (read that again in a deep Hollywood movie voice please). This is the 64 meter radio telescope that received the first contact from the moon landings! Pretty awesome stuff.  

http://www.parkes.atnf.csiro.au 
 
I would have liked to have spent more time here but it was 46 degrees and the only shade we could find was under the four sombreros bought from the Elvis merchandise store! In fact it was so hot that there was no sign my darling son had peed in the car park! Evaporated within seconds! I “whooped” with delight, as we had run out of sandwich bags on the way ! #whoneedspublicloos 

So after a glorious summer we eagerly await the next! We have become utter pansies and find 25 degrees chilly enough for bed socks and a cashmere jumper! Maybe we need to move a little further North! 

I’ll be blogging you all from Kuala Lumpur and Cambodia next month, fingers crossed the kids don’t mind eating tarantula donuts or deep fried crickets! 

Onward on our adventure…..  

Wow it’s the first day of summer! Finally! Our first Aussie summer is here! Everyone has said “just you wait for summer!” Now it’s here and I am delighted!  This also means it’s the 1st of December and the advent calendars were ripped open with great gusto this morning! Ever since 730 when Monty opened door number one, he has been asking “when is it Christmas mummy?” And “I just need to know, when is it actually the real Christmas?” These questions along with “can you just tell me what are MY decorations on the tree” are starting to wear a little thin! Here’s to the next 24 days!

We have been super busy the past few weeks! We have been to pantomime at David Jones department store in the city! It was pretty tame! No saucy Dame, just Ben and Holly and a Thomas the tank engine who had some sort of eye malfunction!

 We have also visited Canberra which was awesome! Someone told Tim it’s a very quiet city! Understatement! Almost like a ghost town! A modern, funky ghost town! It was green, spacious and had a great selection of coffee shops which is always a bonus! We left home at 6am and travelled to Canberra via Goulburn! I am sure there is loads to see and do in Goulburn but in typical tourist fashion, we only stopped to see the Big Merino!

This beast is hollow inside and you can climb to the top and peep out of its eyes! A little odd! The children found the Big Merinos private parts round the back the highlight of the day!

We left the gift shop, via the Sheeps back passage, with about $50 worth of stuff, including a pot of goo (Monty’s choice) which we soon discovered made “fart” noises! Safe to say this was highlight number two! The children in fits of giggles…… silence…..fart noise…..fits of giggles!! To be fair, Tim and I also, childishly giggled our socks off!!

 If anyone is thinking of visiting Canberra, you have to visit the Australian war memorial! http://www.awm.gov.au! The staff are super knowledgeable and helpful, the grounds are beautiful, and there is an awesome exhibit for the children! Tim and I want to visit again so we have more time to visit all the different exhibits, there is so much to see and read about!

We also managed to squeeze in the Telstra Tower (www.telstratower.com.au). It has the most spectacular 360 degree views of Canberra from the top! I would love to insert a family photo here, but the elderly man who was adamant he had taken “quite a few” with our camera, had in fact switched it off! Another good excuse to go back for the week end!

We visited the Australian Mint where the children made their own coins! They were very excited about that!

After the mint, we gave in to Monty’s demands and headed for the dinosaur museum! A cute little cottage full of plastic dinosaurs, fossils, and touchy, feely exhibits. nationaldinosaurmuseum.com.au

It’s not quite the natural history museum but the children liked it, and that’s all that matters!

After a long busy day we headed back to Sydney in search of a watering hole! Fart goo at the ready, we headed into The Surveyor General at Berrima! This pub claims the title of Australia’s oldest continuously licensed Inn. Established 1834, licensed from 1835. A sweet country style pub, that just wasn’t ready for Monty’s goo noises! We downed our wine in between our schoolgirl giggles, and left the diners to enjoy their meals in peace!

It’s now the 16th December! It’s taken me weeks to get this post finished! Poppy’s home from her last day of term, Christmas is around the corner! Tuesday sees the arrival of our dear dear friends and it can’t come soon enough!

It may be a while before I blog again, what with visitors, Christmas partying, childish behaviour etc etc, so, Happy Christmas to you all! I hope you get everything you have wished for! We will be throwing some shrimps on the barbie (honestly) on Christmas Day, thinking fondly of you all at home! We love and miss you!! Xxx

We went out last weekend to celebrate our 6 months in Oz! As we sat, chatting about the past 6 months, Tim noticed something under the seat upstairs!! I’m sure someone out there made this happen!! The Wilson’s of Oz, 6 month celebration and Dorothy was with us!!  

 
The world is a magical place my darlings! Keep holding on to your dreams! 💖

Oh my goodness, it’s been a month since I last opened this up and wrote anything! What a crazy month too!   It all started with the school holidays! We had one day, and then the house was in lockdown! I took Poppy to the Dr as she seemed under the weather, really chesty, high temperature etc! We don’t have a GP as such here, you just go to a “bulk billing” medical centre and get seen by someone! Could be the janitor, and sure as hell you get given anti biotics! 

This particular time we saw a lovely Indian doctor who told us  Poppy had caught pneumonia and was super poorly! He prescribed a McDonald’s and a glass of Milo! (A malted milk drink the Aussies go mad for!). So after an X-ray confirming the diagnosis we went home, tuned into Netflix and got comfy! Monty tried his hardest to irritate his sister while she slept on the sofa but got very little response! She was out of it for a good 6 days! 

By the time Poppy was up and about, Monty took a turn for the worse! Back to the medical centre we went, where the same lovely doctor prescribed anti biotics, a Vegemite sandwich and a glass of Milo! This is not a joke! I almost choked! My boy had bronchitis, I was exhausted and we rushed home for more Milo! (Monty is a marmite fan, and will not cross to the Vegemite side).

  
The whole two week holiday was taken up with wiping noses, passing cups of water (well within reach), administering medicine and crying! Mainly my tears I have to add! I needed my mum! Yup! I needed mum to take over for an hour. I was tired! It’s exhausting looking after poorly kids!  (Note to self: take mum on next adventure).

No sooner had the germs gone, the packing boxes came out! Oh good lord! The owner of our house decided that she needed to move back in, so we were on the move! It’s incredibly stressful trying to lease a house here! The agents advertise the properties, then open them for inspection for 15 minutes! So, we loaded the children into the car, I had armfuls of printouts, we had a strict schedule, and there was no time for a loo break! Actually, Monty has become a dab hand at peeing into a sandwich bag whilst still strapped into his car seat!   

 When you arrive at a property you need to be armed with an already filled out application (just in case you like it), because there may be 12 other people you need to jump ahead of! This particular day we saw 6 houses, 5 of which the cockroaches were welcome to! Honestly I wouldn’t have liked to have seen humans or animals in them! So we found one house and all our hopes were in there! We applied and waited 3 days!  Thank goodness  someone was looking down on us! We got the house!!  

    
  
This move was very different to the last! We didn’t have the two cockney packers, wrapping and boxing up, we had Poppy!! We hired a van, roped in some buddies and off we went! We have a great place now, and haven’t stopped partying and bbq’ing since we got in!  

 
Everything happens for a reason hey! 

  
This little trooper has found this particular move pretty hard going! You think your kids are well travelled, resilient little creatures, but sometimes it’s one move too far! Even with the lilo, the pool and the banana tree out front, I think secretly our darling girl would choose rainy UK, cafe Nero and a wander round tesco express at the moment! 

6 months in Australia this weekend!  Half a year has gone already! Maybe that’s why I said “far out” today instead of “Golly Gosh!”

Wow!  What a couple of weeks! We have had parties, play dates, end of term celebrations, more fairy bread and party pies than you can shake a stick at!  

 That added to all the beers, red wine and crisps, has pushed me head first back into another whole30!! So I am 2 days into it and I am too busy to miss the 11am spoonful of Nutella!

Last week saw the end of term 3 for Poppy! Can’t believe how time is flying! She gets to wear her summer uniform after the holidays, which she is thrilled about (me even more so!).

To celebrate our last day alone before the holidays Monty and I went for a scoot in Cronulla!  We like to race each other! This…..

 Soon turned into this…

Yup, mum of the year award goes to this Pratt who let her three year old scoot a million miles an hour down a hill with no helmet! In typical Wilson drama style, Monty was in and out of concouisnes in the back of the car, so I pulled over, lay him on the pavement and screamed for someone to call me an ambulance! He gave me the shock of my life! Two policemen walked over to check on us, “ah buddy, you hurt your noggin?”….. (Not sure if Monty was confused by the word noggin or out of it?)… “Can you point to where it hurts on your noggin?” No response! Beautiful, tanned, teeny short wearing goddess rang the ambulance for me! I was sweaty, frightened, scruffy and unaware of the black mascara smudged down my face! Damn, I bet she looks perfect even during a drama! So, paramedics arrive, tall….tanned….handsome…cool shades… Since when do paramedics look like they just stepped out of a magazine shoot!!?  “hey buddy! How you going?” (I still don’t get the “how you going” thing!?!?) No response from my boy! “Have you bumped your noggin?” No response! Off we go, me in my trackies (which Tim later tells me are see through!Cringe!) and Monty strapped into the bed with his sore noggin!

In true Monty style we were wheeled into the emergency department, still dazed and confused, asking for a bag of crisps! Two hours  later, having eaten a kit Kat and his crisps, we were discharged with concussion and told to buy a helmet! Didn’t want to say we have one, just left it in the garage!! Safe to say it is now taped to his head before he even looks at his scooter! Bloody kids!

So what do you do when your kid has concussion? You go to your mates house for a last minute party! It was messy! It ended about 9pm with four rather merry adults running around the street in gardening gloves trying to move a birds nest out of a kumquat tree while being pecked at my some mean assed perky birds! The adult birds were swooping anyone who went near the nest so we moved it into the neighbours front garden to save our friends being attacked every time they left the house! Lucky neighbours! Pretty sure it is the same bird that emptied its bladder all over my back a few weeks back!!

Our weekend was pretty quiet after all the excitement  of Friday!  Poppy and I went for a manicure! She loved it! Although she had picked all the varnish off by bedtime!

Unfortunately as I am typing away my poor girl is lying next to me asleep! She has pneumonia and is pretty poorly! She is not a happy bunny! I think this is one of the hardest things about being away from home! The comfort of home! The comfort of family support, of knowing where the hospital is, who to call in an emergency! Who knows which dr you can use with your health cover??!? It’s pretty confusing, even when you don’t have Monty trying to kick the young lady’s sick bucket over, or throwing his captain America shield around the waiting room! (What sort of moron moves abroad just as the free childcare vouchers kick in?) Anyway, she’s had her X-ray, she’s on antibiotics and Monty’s still trying my patience!

Summer is on its way! Hip hip hooray!

This week has been a toughie! Yeah I did just say that! In fact it’s been more than tough! I have spent most of the week with a lump in my throat, fighting back a dam busting amount of tears! (Don’t worry! I’m ok really!) 

 
This week has seen the birth of my niece! She is gorgeous, beautiful, and seems to be an angel!! So why do I feel so sad? I have missed out on the birth of my brothers first child! I want to hold her, to kiss her, to rock her to sleep! I want to be there to, well, just bloody be there! Ok, so we Skype, we email, we text, but nothing (absolutely NOTHING) makes up for missing out on holding a baby, smelling that baby smell, seeing that look that new parents give each other, the adoring way they look at their new child!! Even Monty tried to reach into my phone to stroke baby Daisy while she was sleeping! We are all missing out on this precious family time and it feels pretty damn sad!!! Having said that, we are thrilled and over joyed to have this little bundle in our lives!! We’ll just have to get her passport sorted out! 

 
This week has also seen the first day of school for some special little people back home!  Ok, ok I hear you say!! But stop! When you are 10,000 miles away from home its hard not to feel a little “emosh” about stuff!!  

The “Father’s Day Brekkie” at school this morning was the push I needed to get right over the edge! I turned up late thinking that all the dads would have gone to work, but no! The playground was full of dads, playing soccer, hopscotch, and giant chess, running around with their kids, throwing their heads back with laughter! For goodness sake?! Poppy was in tears!! “I want daddy!” It’s hard to explain to a 7 year old that actually your daddy is busting a gut in a new job, holding it all together so we can have this opportunity and he just doesn’t have the time to come to school to eat a bacon butty and get ketchup on his tie this morning!! To be fair to her, it did look like every dad in the whole of Sydney (if not the whole flipping world) was there!

So, apart from all that, and my son calling me a “cock” in the bank, this week has been good! (He meant cockatoo BTW) 

In other news; I have managed to avoid being peed on by a parakeet this week! It’s only happened once but I can tell you now, I carry a small umbrella in my bag in case I am stranded under a tree!!! Who knew birds wee’d!?  Really, I don’t know what has been more of a shock in Oz, fairy bread, or the size of a parakeets bladder!! In fact, another little shocker this week (my what a week I hear you say!!), was a shopping trip with my gorgeous friends! The trip was planned so that we could purchase “Father’s Day” presents for our other halves! So off we went to BBQ World, Bbq’s Galore, even drove up to The Webber Shop although Webber BBQ’s are just too small!!! Yup, it’s true! The best fathers day  prezzie you can buy an Aussie bloke is a bloomin’ BBQ!  In fact we bumped into another friend in BBQ’s Galore who was also buying a BBQ for her husband! I mean, us Poms know “they” like cooking over coals but Jeepers this was surely being filmed for a new sitcom!?

So another week has flown by, I am now officially a “soccer mom” and we seem to be really getting into the swing of things! What with the BBQ shopping, the parakeet wee, and me giving in to calling crisps, ‘chips’, sweets “lollies” and trousers, ‘pants’! God forbid, I’m practically native!